Final Video Idea

As I think about my father's final transition of life I was inspired to make my final video about him...after all, I can't think about anything else. This class has taught me so many things and I was excited to have the opportunity to apply them in my father's honor for his funeral. I sat down to scan, upload adjust all of my photos began collecting vocal footage from voice mail messages etc. but I still have not let go of my nagging need for perfection....though it is impossible to achieve. I was vexed that my sound was off...I wish I had a shotgun mic I thought to myself as the funeral services went on. I wish my camera was in hd when we captured family moments...etc. then I would be able to make a video worthy of my fathers memory. Even after accepting my technical limitations I still emotionally found it nearly impossible to assemble because of the emotional difficulty despite the technical ease that this process now has because of practice. I ended up having to turn the initial job over to my friend to do his funeral video...perhaps that was too ambitious of me to think that I could possibly make the best video ever and do it in such emotional conditions with only a 4 day window. I was tormented. I did however make a video for him leading up to the funeral.

I have finally come to a resolve of accepting my limitations in this instance. I have also resolved to do a memorial video in my father's honor to give to friends and family. I would like to do it as my final video. I hope that I can get through it.

Here is a video I took when I went home of dad. I encouraged him to say 'lindsey i love you' at this stage he was very confused so scripting was necessary.

My Creative Process Writing Prompt

Describe your personal creative or research process. Provide any information you can on typical approach to creative inquiry in your field. Define the word research as it relates to your work:

 

My creative process works best when I am in alignment spiritually with the surrounding universe. It must be sincere. It starts with right brain thinking and the spirit. The left brain logic comes second hand. In my poetry, most of my work is free written and never edited first drafts. Interestingly, the poems I have edited people prefer them less to my raw poems. This says something to the point of sincerity. As Twyla Tharp alluded to, I have been a victim of my own thoughts, my own internal editor inviting me to fear povery. As an African American woman there are a lot of things that you dream of becoming, poor is not one of them. The more statistics I read, the more it evokes a sense of fear that makes me question the reliance on my internal spirit guide because it seems the academy feels its invalid. In my field I don’t know how creative inquiry is gone about since Communications is such a broad field. Those who are on the quantitative side seem to rely on ocular centric evidence and many of the qualitative types rely on auditory evidence and other forms…there are some that also invite spirit evidence. Gut feelings. Inner knowings. I am such a scholar in my private time but not in my ‘research’ at this point.

How I came into this: Background in mktg and adv --wanted to change marketing discourse around representation. Being a producer of media allows some progress in that area…additionally since I have been here I have been feeling more and more detached from non-academics. I feel the academy has a bad habit of hoarding knowledge and not sharing in an accessible way. Im a slam poet and a former corporate marketer and I got used to the idea of living a double life. Creativity seems more free and honest than ‘research’ in its connotation.

 

Idea for my Documentary

I have been personally interested in the area of African American females wearing their natural hair for a while and I have personally transitioned to natural hair from chemically straightened hair. Many African American mothers are interested in cultivating a positive self esteem for their daughters by showing them media and toys that affirm their natural beauty. Dolls are of concern to the community and though dolls have made progress over the years to become more inclusive, the hair is often straight. This makes some sence seeing that most african american women wear their hair straightened however there is a growing resurgance of women wanting to reclaim their natural beauty and want to see it replicated for their daughters. Some women have resorted to trolling or rerooting doll hair in order to replace the factory hair with kinky hair or even dreadlocks. I was thinking about interviewing Black women with an interest or concern for natural hair and their thoughts on dolls and also a woman who has specialized in spinning dreadlocks for dolls.

One issue I have come across is that the woman is sick and can not meet in person so we have been emailing only. I can incorporate our emailed conversations in the video perhaps. So far I am thinking of a mixture of found and original footage. Found footage may be from media that has dealt with black identity as it relates to natural hair (Good Hairmovie, Tyra Banks Show, My nappy Roots, Advertisements) original footage possibly of ladies I may interview or of me attempting to re-root a doll. Here are some of the questions I may ask the re-rooter:

How long have you been in the business of re-rooting/trolling?

What led you to the business?

Can you briefly describe the differences between of re-rooting, trolling and repainting?

What do you feel your work contributes to society? Why is this craft/trade important to you?

What are challenges that get in your way?

What plans do you have to pass the torch if any (since you mentioned you have retired)?

Could you describe your process of making the hair (spinning, dying etc)?

Can you describe the types of hair you have and what effects you get by combining them?

As an African American female who grew up with dolls with nylon hair I was particularly awe stricken by your dolls and dolls that were made by your hair. Did you intentionally create dolls to feel this void or was it more serendipitous?

How does this work make you feel?

How profitable has this business been for you? If you don't do the business for profit primarily, why do you do it?

How does it feel to know that you have personally done what doll makers refuse to do which is to acknowledge the natural beauty of black women?

Where do you normally get your dolls from and why?

For Ladies interested in natural hair dolls i may ask:

Is it important to you that your child plays with a doll with natural hair?

If given the option between a straight haired doll and a natural doll which would you choose?

How much would you be willing to pay for a doll with natural looking hair (dreads etc)?

Have you ever attempted to buy such a doll for your child or someone you know?

Reflect on your own experience with dolls, what would this have meant to you?